Impressive Breakfast Delivery

Our food was brought to the table by a really happy guy who delivered our breakfast with enthusiasm and joy. No “food slung mindlessly on the table” here. You could almost hear the “Ta-Da”  music in the background. This guy was excited about this food. He seemed to be thrilled to be bringing it to us. It was clear he cared about our experience. His enthusiasm was contagious.

Jo and I watched him over the next hour, bringing delicious  food and his own special brand of joy to each table in the restaurant.  He was the topic of our breakfast conversation, “He acts as if he cooked each dish himself,” “He’s so proud of this food.” “He looks like he’s having so much fun.”

Fast forward three weeks. This morning, three friends took me to Snooze for breakfast to celebrate my birthday week.  Once again, this same young man with the big grin brought us our food. I began to tell my friends about his awesomeness, when they said, “Tell him!”

So we called him over and I told him how much I appreciated him and why.  He said “I love what I do!” and thanked us for making his “day, week, month!”  (He’s exuberant like that.)

We also shared this with Nick the Manager, who told us that Bryce loves what he does, is studying hospitality management in school, and is an amazing member of their team.

And here’s why Bryce Norblom is so amazing:

1. He’s working in his sweet spot. Bryce clearly loves what he does. He has great pride in the food he serves, and creates an excellent customer experience. How could you feel anything but lucky to be eating what this guy is clearly so excited about?  He gives off the vibe that there’s nowhere he’d rather be than right there, and nothing he’d rather be doing than bringing you your breakfast.

2. He makes it about the customer. Today, having heard it was my birthday, he went back and had the kitchen make me a birthday pancake, and brought it out with a lit candle and a flourish.  You could tell he was just delighted to surprise me. And for me, it wasn’t just the birthday pancake—it was his glee at bringing it to me.

3. He’s incredibly cheerful at 7 o’clock in the morning. Nuff said.

So look at your business:

Are working in your sweet spot? Are you passionate about what you do?  Are you doing what you do best and leveraging your strengths?  Are you excited about what you are offering?

Are you making it about the customer? Do you know your customer intimately?  Do you know their pain, their aspirations, their lives?  Are you focused on helping them?  Are you focused on giving them the best products and services you can? Are you constantly looking for new ways of serving them and making their lives better?

Are you cheerful at 7 am? Are you taking care of yourself and getting enough rest? Are you confident that what you do that day will make a difference?  Do you get out of bed excited about what you will create each day?

Incorporating these three “Reasons Why Bryce Norblom is Amazing” into your business can make you as amazing as he is!

I’d love to hear about the “Bryce Norbloms” you’ve encountered, and what made that customer experience so amazing.

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How might things transform if we all lived by this motto? What would the world be like if we all wagged more and barked less?

Leaders and Small Business Owners

Leaders and small business owners would focus on the strengths of their people.  They would share an exciting vision of the future, and help each person see how their contribution helps move the organization toward that future. They would set clear expectations, encourage their people, celebrate their successes, and help them learn from their “creative missteps.”

They would focus on and talk about what’s going right. They’d set achievable milestones so that people would feel a continued sense of progress and achievement. They’d get excited about small wins, and help them become bigger ones.  They’d become each of their employees’ biggest champion.

They’d create an organizational culture that is focused on creating an amazing experience for their customers. They would make their customers feel valued and appreciated, and make each transaction uncommonly good. Their customers would be so happy, that they’d wag themselves, telling others in their circle about their remarkable experience with the organization. Word would spread. Business would increase.  More wagging all around.

In Our Personal Lives

We’d focus on what’s going right. We’d live with a great sense of gratitude, and appreciate all of the awe-inspiring things we encounter each day—the smile of a toddler, a beautiful flower, the touch of a loved one, the taste of a juicy peach, the miracle of everyday life.  We would wag all day long if we simply tuned into just how good things in our lives really are.

We wouldn’t complain. We’d change what we had influence over, and let go of the rest.  We would not spend time complaining about things we have no power to change.  Barking about things we can’t change is a waste of time and energy.

We wouldn’t blame. We would focus on wagging our way to the solution to any problem we face, rather than looking at whose “fault” the problem is.

We’d be a joy to be around. People would be attracted to our positive energy, and want to hang with us. They’d wag more as well.  We’d all be wagging together, joyfully living our lives.

So that’s been my focus this last week—wagging more and barking less.

How about you?  What will you do to incorporate this into your life?  Are your ready to wag more and bark less?

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I’ve noticed that I don’t quite trust Myrtle yet. When I’m leaving my office to go somewhere new, I take a quick peek at Google Maps on my desktop computer and get an idea in my head of where I’m going and what main roads will take me there. Then I trust Myrtle to take care of the details of the small streets once I get in the vicinity of my destination.

Can you say “control freak?”

Last weekend, my best friend and I were headed to an estate sale. True to form, I’d looked at the map on my desktop computer before leaving. I knew where I was headed.

Except that Myrtle had other ideas. As we pulled out of my friend’s neighborhood, and onto the main road, Myrtle told me to “make a right turn on E. Vine Drive.” Now, in my mind, we should be staying on North College Avenue for a few more miles before turning off. But Myrtle said we should turn.

I was going to ignore Myrtle and go my way (Myrtle has a remarkable ability to recalibrate and create a new route when I ignore her gentle urgings), but my friend said, “Let’s just go the way Myrtle is telling us.”

So I turned on Vine. Then Myrtle told me to stay on Vine for a few more miles before turning again. I just knew this could not be right. I knew I should turn left on LeMay. My friend urged me to stay the course, and listen to Myrtle. I said, “I don’t have a half hour to waste if she takes us way out of the way.”

My wise friend suggested it would probably only take us, at best, five minutes out of the way, and that I might learn something. So I decided to let go and give control to Myrtle.

The route in my head would have taken us through this.

Myrtle’s route took us through the scenery at the top of this post. And I don’t think it took us any longer.

My friend was right. I learned something.

Letting go and inviting in outside guidance can bring better results than having a predetermined, rigid plan that you alone formulate.

Start with what you know. Start with your best ideas. Then open yourself up to other possibilities. The world of business today is too complex to ignore the wealth of information that is available to us.

Be open to outside guidance. Input can come from many places. Create your own “board of directors.” These are people you like and respect, who have expertise that is different than your own, and who are open to providing you with information and ideas. They are people you can call or meet with as needed. You can ask questions, and kick around ideas, get a “sanity check.”

Let go of control. And the need to be right. Both important. Both tough. Both will close you off from a world of possibilities.

So here’s a question for you. Where does your need to control things keep you stuck, and limit your business growth and success?

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I’ve had the opportunity to teach their leadership team how to lead change, and to deliver a “How to Thrive and Stay Sane in the Midst of Change” workshop for all of their employees.

When I came across Eric Shinseki’s quote, I knew I had to share it with this organization.  And I knew I had to share it with you.

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

The nice thing about staying in our comfort zone is that we get to be, well, comfortable. We can relax, put it on “cruise control” and never really have to stretch or feel hesitant, anxious, or insecure. We know where we’re headed, what to do, and how to do it. It’s easy.

It’s also a recipe for staying stuck, for not growing, and for not tapping all of our passions and gifts.

Whether we are a business owner, or are employed in an organization, remaining in our comfort zones is a sure path to irrelevance.  And a quick one.

Be Willing to Continually Reinvent Yourself

The world is changing at an unprecedented pace. Those who excel in today’s environment have several things in common:

A willingness to learn something new every day. Do you set aside time to read blogs, listen to teleseminars, read books, attend events, watch webinars? Are you growing and learning and staying ahead of the curve? Are you staying relevant?

A commitment to being unique. In today’s world, you can’t be a commodity.  You can’t be just like everyone else.  You have to stand out, be known for something, be the go-to person for the area of your expertise.  You have to have expertise, and then add your own sumtin’ sumptin’ to make it unique.

The ability to be flexible and to adapt. Markets change. Customer needs are ever evolving. Consumers are faced with a mind-blowing array of choices.  Those who excel stay on the leading edge. They ask their customers what they need. They innovate. They are willing to change and reinvent themselves.

A clear message that they communicate in multiple forums.  Be clear about what you stand for what others can count on you for. Build your reputation. Be visible. Then be more visible.

An emphasis on relationships. In the end, it’s all about relationships. It’s about how you can help other people.  Whether through your services, your products, or just your presence, it’s about how you can be of service to other people. Be amazing at follow up, at staying in touch, at sharing what you can offer to help others.

Seize the Moment- NOW!

“If you don’t like change, you’re going to like irrelevance even less.”

Please don’t read this post and say to yourself, “Hey, those were some good ideas,” and then go back into the safety of your comfort zone. Identify one BOLD step (and if that’s too scary, one small step) that will take you toward the success you dream of, and away from irrelevance.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. What’s one change you can make to make you more successful, and reduce your chances of becoming irrelevant? Share it below.

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Do You Try to Fit In?

“Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out?” This quote from the movie What a Girl Wants sums it up beautifully.

Women often look around at what everyone else is doing, and let that define what they do. They worry about what other people will think.  They are afraid of looking silly.  They stay small. They don’t want to stand out.  They dial back parts of themselves.  And each time they do, they die a bit inside.  And they deprive the world of the opportunity to truly experience what they have to offer.

To be as successful as you can be— in business and in all areas of your life—dive into your own uniqueness. Revel in it, celebrate it, and share it boldly. Put your own unique spin on everything you do.

Passion in Action

Let me tell you about a guy who does.  In April, I attended the Extreme Business Makeovers event  hosted by Bob Berg and Thom Scott in Orlando, Florida.  It was a fabulous event, and I connected with some amazing entrepreneurs from around the country.

In the Orlando airport on my way home, I was tired, my brain was full, and I decided to get a magazine to flip through on my flight back to Denver.  Little did I know as I walked into the newsstand that I was going to get to see passion in action.  I grinned really big when I saw a guy who took what many of us would consider to be a mundane job, and put his spin on it.  Click on the link to see what I saw….

Passion in Action

He shared his own special sauce, his own sumptin’ sumptin’, and delighted an entire store full of people.  And the amazing thing was, he did it over and over, never the same way twice, customizing it in some way for each customer.

So here’s the challenge.

How can you bring your own uniqueness to what you do in an even bigger way than you do now?

What would it take to give yourself permission to be wholly, unabashedly, unapologetically you?

Are you willing to stop reining yourself in and dialing yourself back?

How would your business results and your personal life be different if your brought your own passion, your own sumtin’ sumtin’ to every interaction?

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She lacks focus. Stacey doesn’t seem to be able to set priorities, execute on those priorities, and get her contributions recognized. She’s floundering.  As I talked to her about this, she moaned, “If I only had a mentor!”

Mentoring Has Changed Forever

Stacey was making a common mistake. She was looking for someone to take her under their wing for the next several years and shepherd her through her career. It’s not likely to happen!

Ronna Lichtenberg, in her book It’s Not Business, It’s Personal: The 9 Relationship Principles That Power Your Career says, “It’s an urban  fairy tale—that somewhere out there is that special someone, a mentor, who will take over your career, then not only guide you through it, but hack through the jungle ahead of you, machete in hand, to make space for you to grow, and then in a final burst of energy, whip out a magic wand and grant you not just the job you’ve always wanted, but a bulletproof vest to protect you from the flak that’s gonna be flying at you once you get it.  Oh, and the mentor expects nothing in return, except for the deep, quiet satisfaction of knowing that you got what you truly deserved.”

Mentoring has changed forever. In today’s world, a mentor is anyone who has information or experience that would be helpful to you. The mentoring relationship is often an organic one, and may last anywhere from a few minutes to a lifetime.  You might be both a mentor and a mentee at the same time—even with the same person.

The Sixty Minute Mentor

If  mentoring would be helpful in your business or your life, identify what you need help with.  Then identify someone who knows what you need to know.

Ask that person if they’d be willing to spend some time with you answering your questions and providing some guidance.  Offer to take them to lunch, buy them a cup of coffee, or meet with them at their location.

Plan some questions in advance.  Use their time wisely. That sixty minutes might prove to be exactly what you need to move forward, or it might turn into a longer term relationship. Your sixty minute mentor might also suggest some other folks you might talk with.

Mentoring Moments

Some people won’t have time for an in person meeting.  Ask if you can have fifteen minutes of their time over the phone. You’ll rarely be refused.  It’s amazing what you can learn in 15 minutes of focused time.

Make Sure You Give

How can you be of service to your sixty minute mentor? Be creative.  Do you know something that would be of help to them?  Is there a connection you could make for them with one of your contacts? Is there an article you could send them?

Share Your Tips

What tips do you have for being a mentor or a mentee? Please share them below.  We can all learn from each other!

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Whether you own a business, lead a team, or work for someone else, worry can stop you dead in your tracks, can have you focusing on the worst case scenario, and can result in a case of business or life paralysis.

“I Have a Whole Year to Worry About It!”

One night, on an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, Raymond had anguished for a long time over what to buy his dad for his birthday. He finally decided on what he thought was the perfect gift—a fish tank filled with beautiful fish.

His father loved it. Raymond was so happy!

Later that night, he and his wife were talking about the day. Rather than being grateful that he’d found the perfect gift, Raymond began to worry.

“Oh, no…now I have to top this next year. Dad will expect something even better! How am I going to be able to find something better than this?”

His wife, with an amused glint in her eye,  turned to him and said, “Well, Raymond, you don’t have to worry about it for another year.”

Raymond looked shocked. “Oh, no…You clearly don’t understand worrying—this means I have a whole year to worry about it!”

He had a black belt in worrying. He was a pro.

But it’s not just this TV character. How many of us do this?

Worrying will suck the lifeblood out of your business. It will leave you timid, risk-averse, and discouraged. It’s tough to passionately go after your goals if you’re stuck in worry.

So what can you do?

Top 3 Tips to Get Out of the Worry Habit

When we worry, we’re focusing on the worst case scenario.  That needs to shift. Big time.

1. Start a Worry List

Start a worry list. When you find yourself beginning to worry, take out your worry list, put the topic you’re worrying about on your list, and get back to doing something productive or enjoyable.  You’ll have a set time to come back to your list and worry.  You’ll still get to worry…you’re just postponing it. You’re beginning to break that habitual pattern of worrying.

2. Block Off Worry Time

Schedule a time when you will worry. Let yourself worry for three minutes. But that’s it. Set a timer. Take out your worry list, and see what you want to worry about.

Worry for the time you’ve allotted yourself.  Then move on and focus on what you DO want, rather than what you don’t want.

You might even find that when you set aside time to intentionally worry and you take out your list, you don’t even feel like worrying.  You might wonder what you’re getting so worked up over.

3. Focus on the Best Case Scenario

Ask yourself, “What is the “best case scenario?” What would be the perfect outcome?

Reflect on this scenario, marinate in it, visualize it, feel it. Own it!

Then, ask yourself, “What is the first step that will take me there?”

Action takes your power back. It eliminates that stuck, powerless, overwhelmed feeling that worry creates. It gets you moving in the right direction. It’s energizing!

Take that first step toward your best case scenario. Get it done. Then take the next step.

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So what about you?  Where do you let worry keep you stuck?  And what tips can you share below for giving worry the middle finger?

Here’s the soundtrack for this post: Don\’t Worry, Be Happy Jimmy Cliff/Bobby McFerrin

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Leap into the Experience

Bud knows exactly which stores let him come in.  If I pull up at the grocery store, he knows he’s going to wait in the car, and he’s a patient guy.  But if I pull up at Home Depot, Bed, Bath, and Beyond, Ace Hardware, or Michael’s—places where he’s been in the store—he starts barking as I pull into the parking lot. It’s as if he’s saying, “I know they let doggies in there, so don’t even think about leaving me in the car!”

When I open the car door to move him from the back seat to the store cart, he leaps into my arms with abandon, anticipation and joy.  He gets to go!  He’s ready for a new experience!  He’s jumping in with both all four feet!

How often do we leap into the experience?  And how often do we hang back, dipping one toe into the water, missing opportunities because we were too cautious and hesitated for too long?

Pay Attention to Self Care

When I take Bud into a store, he rides around in the shopping cart.  The bottoms can be hard on little beagle paws.  So Bud has subliminally communicated to me that he’d be much more comfortable if I’d take his cushion that sits in the back seat of my car, and put it in the bottom of the cart.

He rides around in beagle comfort. He had a nice, soft place to sit.

What about you?  Are you willing to ask for what you want?  Are you willing to pay attention to self care?  Or do you spend all of your time being pulled by other people’s needs?

Be Friendly and Add Value for the People You Meet

Bud is really clear about his life’s purpose, even though he’s never read a self help book or been to a seminar.  He knows he’s here to love, and to bring joy to others.

Bud’s a people magnet. Everyone from old men to small children are drawn to this little angelic dog.  He somehow sends out a message that says, “I’d be delighted if you’d come over here and talk to me, or pet me, or say how cute I am! I will be open to you, and will adore our time together.  I will add joy to your life right now!”

Is that the vibe you send out (okay, maybe minus the petting)?  Are you open and friendly? Do you look for ways to help other people? Can you connect in meaningful ways?

Revel in the Moment

Bud is totally present. He’s in the moment. He plays full out.

He’s not messing around with the past, analyzing his puppyhood and the less-than-stellar treatment he had from the person who had him before he came to us.  He doesn’t spend time worrying about whether he’ll have enough time in the backyard to play tomorrow.

Nope, he is where he is. When we’re in the garden section, he’s sniffing the flowers, wagging his tail with glee.  When we’re walking up the hardware aisle, he’s looking around in curiosity and amazement.  When the guy’s cutting my masonite board, he’s totally focused on Matt the awesome lumber guy.

Is that true for you?  Can you be totally present in each moment? This one’s still a challenge for me.  Bud has agreed to be my mentor so I can learn this from him.

When It’s Over, It’s Over

Bud spent no time wishing we could have wandered up one more aisle, looked at one more piece of lumber, or met one more little girl.  Once we left the store, he was ready to leap back in the car, stick his head out the window, and move on to the next experience.

Bud doesn’t look back. When he’s squeezed all of the juice out of this moment, this experience, he’s ready to move on to what’s next.

What about you?  Can you let go and move on?  Or do you get stuck in what could have been?

Bud’s Challenge to Us

So here’s our challenge. Can we take Bud’s Home Depot lessons and apply them to our own lives?  Where are we as wise as Bud the Beagle, and where are our opportunities for growth?

Please share your thoughts below.

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We’ve talked about who you are and why you’re here. So now it’s time to get clear about what you want.  If someone asked you what you really want in your life, would you be able to answer them?

Be Daring and Wild

Edie Galley, a wonderful friend who lives in Florida, posted this on Facebook a couple of weeks ago:

“When you clearly define what you want, no matter how daringly wild it may be, it is amazing how quickly it starts coming together in ways you would have never imagined possible”

When I read that, I got chills. She’s so right.  Nothing happens until we know what we want.  And once we do, once we’re really clear, all kinds of things start happening. Our path becomes clear. Doors open. Connections come into our lives.

Dream Big!

Here are a few ways to dream big, and to get in touch with what you really want. They are not original to me.   They’re tools I’ve collected along the way that you might find useful.

Be, Do, Have

For many years, I attended an annual retreat at Asilomar Conference Center on the ocean in Monterey Bay.  One year I was introduced to a wonderful exercise.  The speaker suggested we create a list of 100 things we’d like to be, do, and have.

I remember taking my notebook to a bluff overlooking the ocean.  I made three columns.

Be   Do   Have

And I filled in those lists with a stream of consciousness without editing or judging.

Although that was over 20 years ago, it’s an exercise I still do regularly.  When I’m “in the groove,” (not nearly as often as I’d like to be), I do it daily.  It keeps me focused on what I really want.

I’ll give you a few examples from my current lists to help you see the difference between the three:

Be: Joyful, wildly successful, loving, kind, creative, goal focused

Do: Speak to large audiences, write a best selling book, help more women by creating products I can share with them, make pottery, hike, learn to knit

Have: A cabin in the mountains, peace of mind, wonderful friendships, balance, abundant prosperity, clients who love me

Imagine that there are no limits, that money is not an object, that your past does not dictate your future, that all of your dreams can come true.  And then make your list.

In your deepest heart, in the whisperings of your soul, what do you truly want to be, do, and have?  Get it on paper—it’s the first step to creating those things in your life.

Ideal Day

This is the big daydream exercise. Imagine your perfect day. Imagine it in technicolor, with all the sights and sounds.  See it from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep.  Where do you wake up?  What is your bedroom like?  Do you wake up alone or is someone with you? What do you do first?  Imagine your entire day, moment by moment in this way.  See it, feel it, smell it, taste it, marinate in it.

Once you have the picture of your ideal day, make yourself some notes. That makes it more tangible.

Turn Away from What You Don’t Want

Don’t put your attention on what you don’t want.  What we focus on appears. Keep your energy and attention focused on what you do want.

Do It Again

Don’t let this be a one time thing. Do your “be, do, have,” list frequently. You’re  impressing those things into your subconscious mind.  Remember Edie’s advice:

“When you clearly define what you want, no matter how daringly wild it may be, it is amazing how quickly it starts coming together in ways you would have never imagined possible”

Please share any useful techniques you’ve used in your own life to get clear about you want in the comments below.  And take a stand! Declare what you want!  Share it with us below and make it even more tangible!

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Why Are You Here?

Last week, I shared that a few years ago, an interviewer asked me a big question, “If people want to reach their full potential, where would they start?” And that my reply was that there are three critical things to start with: knowing who you are, why you’re here, and what you want.

So if I asked you why you’re here, on this planet, at this time, would you have an answer?  Do you know what your life purpose is? Does it guide you?

It’s Bigger Than Goals

Your purpose transcends your goals.  It’s the big picture.  It answers the question, “What are you here to do?” It’s inspiring, engaging and clear.  It creates a passion, a feeling of significance, a focus for your life. Identifying your purpose enables you to choose what to give your time, energy, and attention to rather than being sidetracked by distractions.

I’m embarrassed to say that throughout my childhood and early adulthood, I was famous for my “five minute ideas.” That’s what my friends and my family called them.  I’d get a big idea, a big vision, pursue it briefly with great passion— then I was off to something else that caught my attention and captured my imagination.  My life lacked focus.  I chased bright, shiny objects. I had the attention span of a three year old.

Once I discovered my life purpose, I found the focus my life had been lacking. Suddenly, a lot of my life experiences lined up. They made sense. They were leading me to this realization.

I knew what I was here to do. I learned to say, “no” to things that weren’t aligned with my purpose.

5 Steps to Clarity

You may be wondering, “How the heck do I get clear about my life purpose? That sounds like a huge undertaking!”

It’s not as huge as it sounds. Here’s a process for you.

First, identify your UDQs, your unique, distinctive qualities, such as intelligence,curiosity, exuberance, integrity, commitment.   To get to these, you might think about how you’d describe yourself, or qualities that others have pointed out to you.

If you’re really stuck, ask a few friends what they think your distinctive qualities are.  As part of a planning process I used for this year, I did this. It was quite interesting to see how my friends and colleagues perceived me, and how similar and different they were from my own perceptions.

Second, think of the impact you’d like to have on the world, and on those you interact with. How will people and the world be better off as a result of your having lived your purpose?  Dream about this a little.  Imagine it vividly!

Third, make a list of as many action verbs as you can think of. Try each one on.  Circle those that get you excited, that speak to you.  Then narrow it down to two or three.  Examples of action verbs might be such things as build, motivate, educate, defend, discover, communicate, share, produce, work, explore, and improve.

Fourth, identify who you’re here to impact or help.

Fifth, combine your work in the first four steps into your Life Purpose Statement. Play with the words. Combine them in different ways.  Write down your purpose, go off and leave it for a while, then come back to it.  Is it simple? Clear? Easy to understand? Brief enough to remember?  Does it inspire and excite you?  Does it give you goosebumps?

As an example, here’s mine:

To make a difference by inspiring and empowering people

to live their dreams.

When you have your statement, post it where you will see it.  Carry it in your wallet.

Engage with it each day.  It will provide you with inner guidance, direction, and focus. It will lead you to everything that will support it, and give you the permission to say, “no” to the things that don’t.

I can’t wait to hear what your life purpose is!  Won’t you share it with us in the comments?

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